Joseph

There's not a whole lot in the Bible about Joseph, but as I was reading the passage in Matthew that talks about him I realized that there's actually a lot packed into these few verses about Joseph.

To start, let's read the verses.

Matthew 1:18-25 ESV
[18] Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. [19] And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly. [20] But as he considered these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. [21] She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” [22] All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet: [23]  “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us). [24] When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife, [25] but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus.

There are a few words/phrases that hit me hard as I was reading this: just, unwilling to put her to shame, divorce her quietly, do not fear, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him.

Just: Joseph was a righteous, holy and innocent man. This was part of his character. It reflects the type of man he was, the morals and ethics he held, and the lessons he would impart on his children and the type of family he would create. It also speaks to the fact that Jesus was not his biological child, because sex before the final marriage ceremony was considered a sin, and he would not be labeled as just if he was, indeed, fathering a child outside of marriage, even in betrothal.

Unwilling To Put Her To Shame: Based on all available evidence, his betrothed, his soon to be wife, the one he was committing himself to, had betrayed him. She had betrayed his love and defiled their family. He was shocked and hurt, and the natural response would be to lash out, to punish, to get revenge. He could have demanded justice. He could have insisted she feel the public shame of her adultery. He could have had her publicly executed, and he would have had full legal and religious authority to do so. In fact, in the eyes of many, it would have been just. However, he was unwilling to do any of this. He was hurt, yet he loved her. She would have plenty of natural consequences, but he was unwilling to add to her shame. He had compassion.

Divorce Her Quietly: Though he was unwilling to put her to shame, he was also unable to move forward with the marriage. He couldn't start a life and a family with someone who he couldn't trust and who, obviously, did not hold the same values that he did. Being betrothed, however, meant that there needed to be a legal dissolution of the relationship, a divorce. He was going to divorce her, but, again, quietly, without a huge fanfare. What's interesting about the word divorce here, though, is that, more than just dissolving an agreement and relationship, the word means to release or let go, to free fully, to pardon, to forgive. The Bible isn't clear here whether there was any deeper meaning than the legal action of divorce, but as I read this, I read a forgiveness on Joseph's part. He can't continue on in the relationship, but he forgives her.

Do Not Fear: This is one of the most common greetings by angels when they appear to people, but not in this instance. In fact, neither of the times that Joseph receives a message from an angel is he greeted by being told not to fear. Maybe this is because it's an appearance in a dream or maybe Joseph just isn't frightened by them. However, he is frightened by something else. He is afraid to take Mary as his wife, to continue the relationship. Why? Well, first of all, he can't trust her. He's scared that he'll have a life of constant doubt and mistrust, but I think there's something more. He doesn't want to expose her, which means that if they get married everyone will think the child is his, which, in fact, they did. However, everyone would easily be able to work a timetable and figure out that the child was conceived before they were married. This was a big deal. It was a sin. It would tarnish his reputation of being just. Mary was already going to bear this weight, but Joseph didn't have to, and if he chose to, it would be on behalf of someone who had betrayed him. This scared him. His shattered hopes and dreams and vision scared him. The betrayal scared him. The proposition of taking Mary's hand and embracing her shame and tarnish along with her, scared him. Just like many men, Joseph may have been strong and courageous, not frightened by much, physically, even supernatural messengers, but he dealt with a lot psychologically and had confusion and anxiety and was unsure of the right path and was conflicted, and all of these internal enemies and dangers scared him.

He Did As The Angel Of The Lord Commanded Him: Above all, Joseph was faithful and trusted God. We don't know if Mary had told him this unbelievable story of being chosen to give birth to the Savior of the world or if this dream is the first time he heard it, but either way, upon hearing what the angel tells him, he obeys. I think he was probably still afraid, but he moved forward. He reversed course on his own plans. He chose to believe an impossible story, one that, even if it was true, and even if he believed it, most others in society would not. He chose to, potentially, tarnish his reputation as a just man. He chose to share Mary's shame instead of putting her to shame. He followed God, immediately and unquestioningly.

It's really quite amazing what we can learn about Joseph here, and what we can take away for our lives today.

We should be just (righteous, holy, innocent). We should be kind and compassionate. Compassion is not weakness, but rather an exercise of strength. You can be compassionate when you have the power and authority to inflict punishment/justice, etc… and choose to withhold that power. We should be forgiving. Forgiveness does not, necessarily, mean that we act like nothing happened and nothing changes, but it is a release of the hurt, the grudge, the debt that is built up when someone hurts us. We should be brave and strong, while also acknowledging that oftentimes we're scared, and often, those fears run far deeper than physical threats. We need to take those fears to God. We need to address them. We need to be courageous. Fear paralyzes, but courage drives us on. We need to have faith. We need to be so in tune with God that we hear and recognize His voice, and then we need to have faith that trusts and obeys. This needs to be true even when the path that He places before us seems wrong. Joseph did nothing wrong, but the circumstances God was asking him to go into would appear to be compromising. At the end of the day, doing what God says and being who God made us to be is more important than appearing like we are righteous.